So one would imagine that when one sets off on an around the world trip, one is going to see a lot of stuff.
Now- I understood that and was extremely excited about it…and I still am very excited about it but I had no idea at all how much ‘stuff’ I would actually see!
Im not talking about the scenery, the parks, the lakes, the cities, the people or any of those amazing things because we tell you about all of those…I mean the OTHER stuff!

(The pictures wont always be relevant to the type here they are just funny incidents that have made us giggle on the way…you know…the OTHER stuff!)

The one gazillion different type of ‘mobile home’ we have seen. From big rigs to mini vans to pull out trailers to what appear to be tents on wheels…all of us on the highway 16 in what has become known to us as the ‘caravan whacky races’!
Who knew there were so many different ways to travel with your home on your back?!

The 50 or so different showers we have been in since we have arrived in Canada! Now theres a story…some showers you have to put ‘loonies’ in ($1), some you have to put quarters in (25 cents). In varying different ways you understand…some 3 at a time, some you put in 1 every 4 minutes, some you wait until the water stops and put more in…none of these have been good for me! The first time I experienced this the rule was this.
Put in 3 quarters and turn on the shower. When 4 minutes is up and the light flashes (the light was not in any way shape or form visible from the shower) add one more quarter for your next 4 minutes and repeat if nessesary. Sounds simple right?! I have 4 quarters and 8 minutes is by far long enough for me…but 4 minutes is not. Im ready. I have my 3 quarters in the machine and the shower is going. I have my extra quarter with me at all times ready to add to the machine when the invisible light flashes…so i’ll count. 4 minutes isn’t long so i’ll be fine. I proceed with my shower, counting in my head, quarter at the ready, I get covered in soap and think I had better add my quarter now its been almost 4 minutes. Im quite proud of myself as I drop in my quarter until I hear it drop out of the bottom again. I remain calm and try it again.
Of course the same happens. I realise that time is running out and I dont have 3 quarters to get it to start again if it stops so I try again. No joy. I start to panic ( I know it is stupid but you do!) and jump out of the shower to check that the visible from around the corner light is flashing and it is so I panic all the more and run back into the shower and frantically repeatedly try to put the quarter into the machine. Of course, it doesn’t work and the water very promptly stops! I have to get out of the shower freezing, traumatised and covered in soap and shampoo with one shaved armpit. I was fuming. I kicked the shower and swore at it and threw my quarter on the ground. I got as dry as I could on my superlight, supersmall, superdry, cling film like towel (which is usually a godsend) and stomped to the sinks and rinsed my hair in the baby bath. I picked up the quarter knowing that Alex would quiz me about where it was if it didn’t go in and stomped back to the van. In a foul mood I explained about the stupid shower while Alex calmly dried his hair and looked like he’d been for a spa afternoon, all relaxed and clean with no traces of soap. He took the quarter from me and examined the stupid piece of metal to see if there was an explanation to it all! There was…it was an AMERICAN quarter!!!!!! The same shape, size, weight, same number on the damn thing but just not Canadian! So it transpires that showers in Canada dont take American quarters. Lesson learned…you would think.

This was one of my early experiences and there have been many like it but there a no two showers (or experiences) the same. Some showers spray directly into your face…they’re generally the nice power showers that aren’t adjustable and you come out with black eyes. Some showers are cold, some hot, some with lots of water others that feel like pins and needles all over you. Some of the shower cubicles have doors, some dont, some have curtains that love you and stick to you just like they did to the last person in there. Some barely spit at you, some have clean floors and some have none slip mats. These are fun. Alex and I where possible shower together. Not for any other reason than that it is cheaper, we only have one bottle of shampoo and its a lot funnier. The last shower with the none slip mat was so funny we laughed the whole time we were in there. It did not stop you from slipping, it just stuck to your feet. It had holes all over it and was like standing on an octopus with its suckers up. So imagine it if you can (maybe try imagining us with clothes!) in a space smaller than a meter squared with one of those curtains that loves everyone on a non slip mat that sucks to your feet with a shower that feels like pins and needles laughing our heads off. Of course we were being silly talking about the scenario where one of us has to take the other to A&E with a broken arm and a non slip mat stuck to their feet. They would rush said person in and start removing the over friendly mat from their feet thinking that was the problem as surely you would not be able to injure yourself in any other way whilst standing on a non slip mat! Anyway, it got silly but you see how these experiences are so valuable.

So the showers have been a real learning curve and something I cannot wait to take for granted again!

Another thing we have seen a lot of is toilets. I wont go into so much detail with this but it has been interesting to say the very least.

And my absolute favourite thing is the bugs! We have bugs upon bugs here. And they’re nearly all mean! In the UK we think the size of the bug matters, the bigger they are = the meaner they are. Not here in Canada, you are actually pleased if a huge dragonfly lands on you because it is not going to suck your blood, inject you with an anticoagulant or bite you for the hell of it, it is just posing for the other dragonflies. But if a midge lands on you you are instantly on the attack. The mosquitos here are pure evil and work in groups. 15 of them attck you in the face causing you to flap wildly while another 5 bite you on any single piece of naked flesh. It hurts alot. However since arriving and receiving more than my fair share of mosquito bites it appears I have built up some resistance and they no longer swell into unsightly boils they just look like little nips and itch like crazy.

My next favourite variety of biting bug is the horse fly or deer fly. Both equally vicious and the deer fly the carrier of Lyme disease (which we have been vaccinated for parents dont worry!) they are horrible. It amazes me that they can land on you and bite you without you noticing because they are big. Bigger than a blue bottle and uglier they leave awful bites which I have experienced first hand. Horse fly cut the skin when they bite rather than pierce it and the bites swell and bruise black and throb for days and days and then disappear without trace!

And the piece de resistance, my favourite of them all is the blackfly! Tiny little evil beasts that crawl behind your ears or into your hairline where it is cozy and warm and drink your blood! The female blackfly needs a meal of blood before she can lay eggs so at least it is nice to know that when you have been bitten your blood is going towards creating even more of the little beasts to come back and bite you again next year! She stretches the skin with her teeth and then scrapes it away. This cuts the skin and then she feeds by adding an anticoagulant to the wound and sitting back on her sunlounger behind your ear and enjoys her bloody mary! Once she has had her fill she flies off leaving you with blood trickling down your neck which understandably scares everyone to death as they think you are bleeding from your ears. I was lucky enough to get bitten 5 times behind both ears and in my hairline on my second wedding day at the vinyard. Nothing finishes off a wedding like blood running down your neck and out of your ears!
So that is to mention but a few of the little devils that are along for the ride with us. To be fair as we have journeyed west the bugs have dwindled and we have come out of the other side of the blackfly mating season so shouldn’t have those to worry about again for a while. And although they are there and I am moaning about them they dont affect the amount of fun we are having very often. I would say maybe only 2 or 3 times have they stopped us sitting out at night so thats not so bad.

Although I have had a little whine, in the same breath I also cannot tell you enough how amazing Canada is. My moan is not about Canada or any of the places we have been and I know we have only been through Canada so far on our trip but it is the most stunning place! The scenery is astounding, the colours are so vivid, the air is so crisp and fresh and the people are so friendly it is like no other place I have even been!

So now you have read this you will understand somewhat how much fun we are REALLY having even when we are not climbing mountains, watching rodeos, having weddings, seeing amazing sights and having the most wonderful time of our lives. We are also experiencing the very spice of life and wishing only sometimes that we could add yoghurt!

See what happens next on our wedding travel adventure!